We got our first batch of fall weather up here, cold and rainy. I was enjoying puttering around the apartment on Sunday, drinking coffee, nibbling on biscuits I had made for breakfast, and occasionally catching a glimpse of the rain spattered and gray streets out the windows. That night Bif and I went for a walk outside and you could smell all kinds of fall on that cold and rain fresh air; smoke from fireplaces and wet leaves.
I'm concerned about not ever being able to find a house, about being priced out of it just like California. I've been thinking about having to get out of the apartment at some point to have more room for the kid. But wandering around last night, looking at the walls we've painted the way we wanted, at the pictures and paintings produced by friends that we've hung up, feeling the cold from the windows pressing into the warmth of the room and thinking about how the place was soon going to be full of the mad chaos of a baby, I stopped worrying for a moment.
Yesterday we went and looked at another sonogram of the baby. It was quicker and less detailed than last time. They were essentially just looking for an issue with the placenta that would cause a C-section, but the problem appears to be no more. We were able to see fuzzy images of the face though; big baby cheeks and a nose - it's good to have a nose. But the little foot that we got a snap shot of killed me. I could see myself cupping those little feet to keep them warm while I held onto the critter, and for some reason I always imagine it trying to grab onto the beard I will grow back when I'm done with the show.
The medical office where we get the sonograms done at is on the 11th floor and provides an amazing view of Capitol Hill and parts of downtown. I was showing my mother-in-law the view, looking down at the red and yellow trees and all of that wet brick, and she asked if I thought we'd ever move back to California.
I've given up on thinking I have any idea on what life is going to throw at me, but I have a feeling that my California days are done. I'm pretty happy right where I'm at.
Rocktober song of the day: There's No Home For You Here by The White Stripes
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7 comments:
that post made me happy and sad. glad to hear that the baby sausage will have cheeks, a nose and some feet. that's awesome! o my god, you're totally gonna be someone's dad.
this brought a tear to my eye.
love you billy. you too beth.
fancythat...please reveal yourself!
I want to recipricate the love.
It's me, Dougie P.
ah..you had an alias..how double agent.
Love officially recipricated.
*tear*
Grin.
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